Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Interfaith Relationships II

I posted on this subject Monday, but I suspect that most people who started to read that post thought they were going to read about dating/marrying outside one's own faith. There was very little, if anything, about that; it was more about friendships. In all fairness, I think that there is a lot of confusion about interfaith relationships in terms of dating and marriage, also.
I'm not going to try to tell you who you should or should not date. Miriam made that mistake (God smote her with leprosy). I will say this, though: The axiom is "opposites attract;" however, lasting relationships are built on common ground. If you really want your relationship to work, you need to sit down and decide what is important to you, and get with somebody who feels that those things are important, also. If your religion is important to you, then you really should be with someone, not only of the same religion, but someone to whom religion is important, also.
A lot of people talk about both interfaith and interracial marriage saying that the Bible forbids both. The only reference I've ever been able to find, as far as interracial marriage, is in Numbers 12, which I referenced above; Moses' sister Miriam was smote with leprosy because she dared to criticise Moses for marrying an Ethiopian woman. Of course, he married Zipporah before God gave Moses the law... As far as interfaith marriage, I think that there is a better Old Testament scripture on that subject, but the only one I can come up with this morning is Exodus 34:17, but I think that makes the point that God didn't want the Israelites marrying outside the faith, because He knew that, at least in some instances, the Israelite men would wind up worshipping the gods of their pagan wives.
Apostle Paul writes a little bit differently in 1 Corinthians 7. He says that if a 'believer' (a Christian) is married to an 'unbeliever,' that is not a good enough reason to divorce. I don't think that Paul is suggesting that it's okay for a Christian to marry someone who is not a Christian, but acknowledging that two people who are married don't always maintain the same priorities. They may get married, and then one get saved, or two Christians may be married, and one backslide. Either way, Paul says that the believer should stay with the unbeliever, unless the unbeliever chooses to depart, in which case, okay, they didn't want to live for God, and they weren't willing to share their life with someone who was living for God, so, let them go. The believer is then free to be single, or to marry someone else.
Just an aside, I hope this doesn't sound like bashing, but I know that the Roman Catholic church in particular is very picky about 'recognizing' marriages. I knew a young Catholic woman who fell 'in love' with a Protestant man; after several months of marriage, that her church would not recognize, these two realized that they were not nearly as much in love as they thought they were. Some time later, she fell in love again, but, this time, with a Roman Catholic man. They both wanted to get married in 'The Church.' The church insisted that before they could get married, she needed to to get the church to annul her first marriage. I'm not clear on how the church can annul a marriage that the church didn't recognize in the first place... They were only to happy to grant the annulment, it was really just a paperwork drill... I also knew a young man that was a born-again Christian that wanted to marry a Roman Catholic woman. She wanted to get married in 'The Church,' so he attended Catechism class and became a Roman Catholic. He told me he didn't understand what all the fuss was about; Christian is Christian, right? Sometimes people just make too much of some things. Jesus talked about choking on a gnat, and swallowing a camel... Of course, He was talking about the religious leaders of the day concentrating on making sure all the little things are right (and the little things should be right) and getting so focused on those things, that major problems slipped right past them. All too often, the religious leaders of today fall into the same traps.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Pete,

I am really having a hard time dealing with my emotions. I know that dating this guy is probably not the best thing to do because of his different ‘faith and priorities’. But I find myself still hoping and praying that we could make it work. I want to stop thinking about him. I’ve been praying a whole lot and asking God to take these feelings away… I don’t know what to do.

Lyn