Silly Questions

Dave Barry once wrote that "a woman is someone who, when asked what is wrong, says, 'Nothing.' A man is someone who, when he asks a woman what is wrong, and she says, "Nothing," believes her.

Really, I think that it is not so much that we believe her. I know that on more than one occasion, I have spent an inordinate amount of time trying to get a woman who was obviously troubled, to tell me what was wrong, only to come to the conclusion that she wasn't going to tell me until she was ready. So, after exhausting all known methods for extracting information, I decided that is was best to go along with the game and pretend that nothing was bothering her. Apparently, women find it considerably more satisfying to lower the boom on someone who appears not to realize that she is upset. I'm not sure why that is, but that understanding can be a real timesaver.

God sometimes doesn't answer right away, either. Maybe that's where women get it, I don't know. Oftentimes, we pray to God, expecting a yes-or-no response, and the answer we get is, "Wait." And we ask, "For how long?" and we get no response. And a lot of times, when the solution (finally) arrives, we realize that God set the answer in motion before we even asked. Is that because He knew that we would, or just that time is meaningless to God? I'm not sure.

You've probably heard the story about the man who had a conversation with God and was asking silly questions:

"God?"

"Yes, my son?"

"How long is a million years to you?"

"A million years to me is like a second to you."

"Oh. (long pause) God?"

"Yes, my son?"

"How much is a million dollars to you?"

"A million dollars to me is like a penny to you."

"Oh. (long pause) God?"

"Yes, my son?"

"Can I have a penny?"

"Certainly, my son. Just give me a second..."

Money is certainly meaningless to God, and I suspect that time is, too. We know that He knew the end from the beginning; some say that it is because He controls everything, but I believe that He has given us freedom of choice. I believe that God knows everything that will ever happen because He is not constrained by the flow of time the way that we mere mortals are. He can see what is going to happen, without guessing, and without manipulating. Oh, don't misunderstand me, God does manipulate things sometimes, but only for the greater good--and, usually, because one of His children has asked Him to.