Names

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who hangs on the wall?

Art.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who sits in a firepit?

Ash.

What do you call a woman with no arms or legs who sits on a fence?

Barb (of course, it would have to be a wire fence).

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who floats in the water?

Bob.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who spews oil?

Derrick.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who sits in a hole?

Doug.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who sits in the trees?

Forrest.

What do you call a woman with no arms or legs who sits on a wall?

Ivy.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who sits in the trunk (or boot) of a car?

Jack.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who sits in the bathroom all day?

John.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who sits in front of the door?

Matt.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

What do you call a dog with no legs?

It doesn't matter. He's not going to come.

Okay, enough. I met a man with an unusual name today. Of course, I've met people with some very unusual names in the past. I think the most unusual has got to be a guy whose parents were such huge Star Wars fans that they actually had their last name legally changed to Starcruiser.

One of the things that bugged me about Star Wars was the inconsistency in the pronunciation of the name "Leia." Some of the characters pronounced it, "LAY-a" and some "LEE-a." But she introduced herself (via hologram) near the beginning of the movie. Everyone should have pronounced her name the same way she did. Only Darth Vader might be forgiven for mispronouncing her name, since he might have read her name from a report (we don't know how he learned her name). The bottom line is, that each of the actors was given a script, and memorized the lines, and by the time they started filming, some actors had the name firmly planted one way, some had it set the other way. Not to suggest that Star Wars was the only movie that happened in. Lesson learned? Use common names in movie scripts.